Angela Sumner
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Uplevel Yourself

 
 
 
 
☀️ Solstice ☀️ Can you tell me what 1/2 a year means to you? + What will the rest of your 2018 look like? + My beast-family ran over to greet me and I began to bawl. They promptly started eating grass with a mean side eye that said: get it together, Human Queen lady. Let’s play. + Okay. + Okay. + And then I started manically water color painting horses and flowers and drinking red wine from a giant goblet like the hot-mess-Georgia O’Keefe-wannabe-I-am-but-everyone’s-got-a-fucked-up-life-story-so-I-don’t-idolize-her-however-some-of-her-art-is-okay-actually-most-of-it-is-mediocre-like-me-so-I-love-her 👑👑
There is something about love that cracks us wide open. It makes us crazy. Love is the reason we do everything we do. It’s the reason we want to perfect our bodies and be seen as attractive, so someone will love us. It’s the reason we post on here, so we feel seen heard and loved. It’s the reason we are jealous and competitive and say things we may not entirely mean and it’s the reason cyber bullying and in-real-life bullying happens - because we want to express ourselves and if anyone challenges who or what makes us feel loved, we have to defend it to put our love back in balance. It’s the reason we take every action we take in our lives - we want to feel loved. + Love is the reason I can’t get out of bed when my grandma dies, when though I’m a death doula and she told me the night before she was going to die. The love aches. The love rips me open. Love is the reason my name means literally Angel Summoner. + I don’t always do things that make me feel good about who I am, and usually it’s because I don’t feel loved. Yesterday I made a post because my feelings were hurt and I’m really f*cking exhausted from loving so much and then being tossed aside by those who “loved” me. It’s exhausting loving so much and it all happens at once. So I will not defend myself. I will only say that this year has been the hardest of my life, and I trust the years that follow will only get harder. They will FYI. I lose my sh*t sometimes. But I come from love and I will return to love and - as always - I will do better next time. 🌰🌹🥀 Grandma Summoner, I summoned the angels for you and they took you away. See you soon. Love, your glow in the dark angel summoner. 💀
Can anyone explain this to me? I have literally not had a conversation with this person in 3 years... we met, maybe said 3 sentences to each other and then I *think we saw each other at another event and maybe hugged. It was that minute of an interaction that I can’t remember anything except her armpits were so hairy they tickled my shoulder blades and made me laugh. And now this? Social media is F*CKED. Anyone care to explain? I have zero beef with Gwyneth. I actually hella respect the Kardashians. And the ego is my favorite part of being humans. There is no tea hierarchy? Although my @globalteahut arrived today so maybe I missed something? This hatred happens nearly daily and it’s THE SOLE REASON I DO NOT ATTEND @SPIRITWEAVERS OR OTHER GATHERINGS ANYMORE WHERE IT’S ACCEPTABLE BEHAVIOR WHEN ANYONE SPEAKS OUT AGAINST THE GROUP MIND (LIKE ME)... and unless someone brings it to my attention via a text, trollers and haters hide behind their passive aggressive obsession with me without even tagging me!!!! What’s a girl gotta do to have a straight up convo, @ameliaaa__franklin??? 🔥 Let’s talk. I got a text that said “SW has begun” with a pic of this post. Women have GOT to learn to love one another. I had beef with SW, spoke it to the creatress, and left. Next thing I knew I was the “1st person banned” from the gathering - it’s heresay, I have no idea if it’s real. But still. It’s so perverse the way we backhandedly treat one another. And it hurts. It’s dumb as f*ck but it hurts to be loved so much people can’t handle their sh*t. THATS HOW I FEEL ABOUT THAT.
3️⃣3️⃣ Solar Return 3️⃣3️⃣ I am taking my birth month of June away from here. You can find me @weargoddess and the Hyperdimensional Human podcast with new mini-course episodes 2x/week. + My 33rd year has been insane. I have 1 month left. I need to go away if I want to reach 34. + I experienced the sorts of betrayal that apparently don’t only happen in fiction. aaand I wrote a very non-fiction book about it which is coming as soon as I can decide how to release it. + My beloved @audreyjonez turned 15! + The true meaning of integrous sisterhood arrived after I begged for years. I can’t tag you all but YOU KNOW. + I successfully? held my 1st & only? @phoenixgathering where a woman died on Samhain/Halloween. I communed with the dead in ways I had no idea were possible. I watched her (ex? how does that work?)husband find his new Phoenix partner and have heard their due date is the Phoenix number of 22🔥. + Everything is connected especially when we don’t want it to be. + I cut my waist length hair to an inch all over my head & found beauty DEEP within. + I went to England for closure, buried myself in a centuries-old graveyard and screamed until I literally burst my own eardrums. + The twin flame journey REALLY revealed itself. + The Isle of Skye gave me my own James Bond month. + An island in the Salish Sea asked me to call it home. + The Masculine slapped me in the soul with the truest, limitless love I never believed could exist. And he is THE YUMMEST. + I closed the circle of The Phoenix Experience with 108 participants exactly. + I know nothing became my life calling. + @weargoddess celebrated 1000 sales! + I pulled a Jesus and died/came back to life at Easter. + + I lost my 2nd child (she’s not lost but you know what I mean). + I fell in love with myself for the VERY 1st time. + My podcast arrived! The Hyperdimensional Human podcast is free mini-lessons aka me in your ear! + I found out what not giving a f*ck actually means. + I forgave my father. + I prayed for the 1st time in 17 years. + I am currently helping my matriarch die. + I’ll see you on the other side.🐺
Where Is The Masculine? + A few years ago my mama‘s brother went missing. His name is Franklin. Uncle Frankie. When I was little my mama would make an extra plate at dinner hoping he would show up. He was so skinny you could almost see through his arm. I remember he wouldn’t really look anyone in the eye. I wanted male attention more than anything. I didn’t have a daddy or any granddaddy’s. Addiction runs through my veins in a way most people can’t understand. Everyone in my bloodline is an addict. So when I wrote an Ask Angela blog a year or so ago about how addiction doesn’t exist, people said I didn’t get it, I didn’t understand, I never knew what addiction was, I couldn’t possibly understand. I was trolled and scrutinized over my opinion, but what everybody was sharing was opinion. It’s ridiculous how people think they know things. People used “science” and “studies” and “what has been proven”, but Every. Single. Thing. That. Comes. Out. Of. Your. Mouth. Is an opinion. Nothing is proven that can’t be unproven. Today I stopped to put air in the tires of my brother-in-law‘s car. I pulled up to the gas station in the middle of nowhere. I didn’t have any change. I didn’t have any cash. I went inside and asked if they had an air gauge so I could see if I needed air. My tire went flat on the way to my grandma’s hospital so I needed to check it today. The man behind the register gave me 4 quarters. He was from somewhere in the Middle East. Then I went outside. One of the skinniest black men I’ve ever seen in my life (who I saw on my way in) walked all the way around the back of the building and came over to where the air gauge was. He walked right up to me and asked me if I had any spare change. I said no, I just went inside and they gave me some. He pulled a dollar bill out of his pocket, straightened it out and handed it to me. I don’t know much, but I knew to take it. Who knows if he needs it more than me. He held out his other hand and I took it. We held hands for a a few seconds. He wreaked of stale liquor and who knows what else. I said what’s your name? He looked at me, smiled, “Frankie” and he turned around and walked off. 🐺
First of all, use your 2 fingers to ZOOM IN on the droplets. Yum. + In the midst of watching my grandma do her thing, a nurse asked me why I was so calm. Cool. Why I haven’t cried. “I am sleep deprived and I haven’t eaten much so bear with me as I try to compose my thoughts” I said to her. And to you as I pour apple cider vinegar in my coffee with heavy cream. It’s 3pm and I haven’t eaten yet which is fine bc I am an intermittent faster (more on that in the women’s group that starts JUNE10!) but not fine since I haven’t really eaten anything except green powder and collagen protein powder in a week. I ruined a perfectly good coffee. I’ll probably drink it anyway. + I am not sad about living so why would I cry? I asked. Living? She asked. She is DYING she whispered to me, (as if it’s some kind of secret?) Here we go. Round and round we go. Okay. I step back. Okay. I move closer to her because closer is what this world needs, not further away. I lean towards her and I say Grandma? She’s no closer to death than I am. I don’t cry for her and I don’t cry for me but I absolutely cry over what humans expect from life when they think they’re dying. + I like flowers kinda but I LOVE flowers in the spring. I love watching the phases. The newness freshness of budding, the vibrant life, the slow discoloration of death, the decay and disregard that leads to the rebirth. The bud! + I stare and cry and I touch them. Yum. I touch them so tenderly and sometimes I crush them in my hand because I can. + And silently I say to the nurse, to grandma, to the flower, to me, I say : This is why we’re alive. ALL OF IT. The whole cycle. Not part of it. Not just the living or the prettiness. All of it. It’s so simple. It’s soooo complicated. + I suggest you go sit with some flowers. They’ll teach you. + Also I have a story for you but you’ll have to sign up for my newsletter for that 💌 Hit me up w a DM 🍭
Today, I am struggling. Struggling is OKAY, Y’ALL. + We tried to take her ring off and that didn’t go well. My grandma is the classiest sass mouth I’ve ever known. They tried to draw blood and 3 veins collapsed. I looked at that woman - the phlebotomist - and she left the room promptly. I’m reaching the point of losing it but then I’ll just have to work hard to pull it together so there’s no point in losing it. + If you lose something, you’re the one who has to find it. Better to hold onto it. And work with it. And learn how to manage your time and energy better. + I was feeling all the human feels so in the hospital room I recorded a podcast on my 2 previous assistants who were total wastes of a lot of money and even more time and hiring them was some of the worst decisions/best lessons of what kinds of relationships I want to have EVER. My grandma grunted when I finished the episode so I put it aside for later. Of course there was a Hyperdimensional yummy twist - how to hire or never hire from a Hyperdimensional perspective. Im taking my own advice for REAL next time. P.s. I love my previous employees and have loved not having one even more! I’ll need help soon. Yikes. I can’t think about that right now. + Then I recorded an episode on adornment which was fun. My nips are out in the Deep South where everyone says it’s disgusting but not directly to your face bc that’s rude but what is polite is that when you ask someone how they are, they sigh and say “Well, I’m doin okay I guess but my diddy is sick and we’re in the middle of movin house but yea everybody is okay how bout you, you look just like your mama bless her heart how is she, is she still married to that man from the other side of town, where they livin now, didn’t you have a brother and sister, how’re they?” HOW is that an answer? The episodes I record while in this hospital room will come a little later. My nipples in this hospital need a sweater. + Anyway. Episode 4 just went live! Search Hyperdimensional Human on iTunes and Stitcher - subscribe and leave a review! 💌
💦feminine mystique💦 I’ve been sitting in the hospital with my matriarch. Life death rebirth ♻️. I asked the nurse for a yoga mat and she said they don’t have that. So I went around and asked all the doctors and nurses and nurse assistants in the critical care unit of the heart center, I asked WHY? Why is there no filtered water? Why is there NOTHING green on my grandmas dinner menu? Why is the meat factory farmed? Why can’t I give her algae and green powder and herbs to help support her body? Why the HELL is every single drink in styrofoam - a material filled with carcinogens? Why does the hospital seem to promote illness? They all stared at me. No one knows. + I am not criticizing. I LOVE the nurse assistants, nurses, doctors, the transportation and lab techs. They are phenomenal. I may seem rude. I’m curious: they laugh and say no one has ever asked that while their loved one is on the “brink of death.” She isn’t. She’s well alive right now. + My grandma is the only grandparent I’ve ever had. She raised me. She taught me how to be classy and sassy and raise hell when something doesn’t feel right. She never told me to be quiet or sit down or be nice. So I’m raising heaven here on earth FOR HER. + Someone asked me why I post such personal things on social media. I’ve been scrutinized for “over-sharing” by partners except my current god of a partner YUM 💎 @traviswals. I’ve had people ask me if I keep anything to myself. I keep feeling confused. Maybe you can explain it to me? + What about life ISN’T personal? + Why share photos of the unimportant? Is that what you want to look at and elevate in your world : the unimportant, impersonal things? You want people to see photos of pretty things that don’t matter? + What is sacred and what is not? And why not SHARE exalt and multiply the sacred the complicated the very very personal??? I want to share things that shake you up, make you feel, make you think, make you challenge me so I can grow and learn and have even more magnificently complicated experiences. + I saw this flower and I got wet. Some people get turned on by muscles or loud cars. Flowers do it for me. I got it from my grandma. + What turns you on? 💦
That giant building front and center is the opera house. And the tiny red building? The police station. That’s exactly how the world should be. And I rarely use shoulds. 🎶🌏🔊
Episode 2 of the podcast is LIVE and it’s all about Dimensions. If you’re like me, you aren’t exactly sure which dimension you fit into - the 3rd is kinda homey (but a tight squeeze) and the other Ds feel a little too woohoo. This mini-lesson on dimensions will open you to the possibility of your own unique hyperdimensionality through a guided journey. There are some hidden messages (there will always be hidden messages)... Let me know if you can find them 👂🏽 + Search Hyperdimensional Human Podcast on iTunes or Stitcher and please subscribe! And share! Duh. After the 1st 15 episodes are published, I’ll have guest interviews with some of my most fave Hyperdimensional humans. Yum. You don’t wanna miss this. I mean, I don’t want you to miss this. We gotta stay in this together 👑👑👑
How do you know this isn’t real life? + If you haven’t watched my live, you have a couple more hours! I don’t know how to save it. I am not in the hospital, my grandma is. I mean, technically I am at the hospital with her but I am not hospitalized. I am healthy as ... a rose bush in the south r n. Yes, an interview is required to join the 3 month intensive women’s circle. It’s called The SOB (Season of Being) which is a big giant f*ck you to the patriarchy. 🔛hyperdimensionalhuman@gmail.com New website, check it. But most importantly: new PODCAST. I know, the music is terrible. Listen anyway. Search iTunes “Hyperdimensional Human Podcast” And if you’re a podcasting expert, help me. I did it all myself which is why it’s so ghetto. 🐺
✈️It’s ALL on time💌 Last night I sat next to my matriarch, watching her chest rise and fall. I was supposed to visit her while on the east coast and I am visiting her but it’s not what I thought it would be. I heard she was in her garden less than a week ago; her fingernails confirm this information with dirt embedded underneath her magnificently strong nails. She used to pop Tums when I was little. She told me the calcium made her nails and bones strong. She probably still takes Tums every day. It’s kinda like how she told me Jaegermeister was for “breaking up the tight chest” and she’d take a swig before bed. They said she was in her garden and then the next day she was close to death. I was confused. I am confused. Time stands still and yet I am immediately thrown back to being 4 years old and trying on all the jewels in her chester drawers. If you’re not from the south, that would be a dresser to you. She would semi-swat at my little hands, but laugh. I was mesmerized by the jewels. I didn’t care if they were real or fake. Does it really matter? She would fake swat me then tell me to “get on, now, go play in the pool!” One day a few years ago she called me into her room and gave me an emerald solitaire. I thought it was fake. It might be. I don’t care. It’s the color of her rose thorns. She loves roses. I refuse to cry at her bedside. I cry now but it’s only because she can’t see me. But can she? My aunt told me my grandma had sciatica the day before she collapsed. When I asked grandma if there was anything I could do, I looked in her eyes. I told her to let me know and I would do it. After I left the hospital, I stretched and got ready for bed. As I lay down, my breathing got fast. The pain shot down from the base of my skull straight down to the back of my ankles. I didn’t sleep a wink, the sciatica took over my whole body. When I went back to the hospital this morning, I asked her if her pain was gone. She said, “yep” and sorta smiled. Thank you to the Clara McLean House for the hospitality and the caregivers at my grandma’s hospital for doing everything you can do to make her cozy and keep her sassy. Nurse Amy, specifically, you are a Queen. 👑